mid holidays

Half of the holidays have passed by. And I'm still slacking at home, didn't want to go to work. I know it's bad to let this long holidays gone to waste at home, but i just don't feel like working. But being at home doesn't seems any better. Everyday it's just me, alone in the house. Every night i see my family for about 4-5hours? And back to the routine when I'm alone again. Feel so useless in this house. This feeling gets worst when i know i couldn't change my thinking. Few days back, i had a dream. I wake up in tears and hope this dream will only be a dream.

It's raining heavily outside now. Wonder where will be flood again. On this kinda weather, it makes me emo more. I looked out of the window. The rain drops were huge and continuously. It seems like an enormous kettle is pouring down. =/

I've been thinking about the past a lot these days. Way back when i was in primary school. I like how dumb and naive back then. Those little admiration i had, i never told anyone. And those bickering i had with some people, thinking of it sometimes bring a smile on my face. =) Later on was secondary school life. It was a place where i grown up very fast and learn a lot. It was also a place where i met all sorts of people, and know something special. Everyday is school but everyday is filled with fun and joy. =D On the other hand, people change very fast too. Some turns better, some turns bad, and so i had a new way of looking at people. Anyway, those days were the days i wish it never end.♥ Moving to next stage, i thought i would go to a JC, but i couldn't and I'm glad i didn't. ☺ Polytechnic sounds better, right? Keke. Everything there were so like a stranger to me. You have to start from the beginning again, to learn every simple things. Know a lot of friends, and amaze they still notice me even though I'm behaving so quiet. =) Oh, and i came to know about how i kept everything inside my heart. Right now i'm still the same. =/ Uni? Needless to say, it is hell. The pace is so fast. You need good brain or you will have to be like bookworm. @_@ Of course I've to turn into a bookworm cause i don't have good brain like others. Some days, i really felt quite lost in Uni. Wondering why am i here? Is it just to escape from the working life?