Whirlpool of emotions.

Exams in 2 days time!!! Argh! I feel like an unlucky girl. I hate it when i get menses during exam period. Cause i will tend to be absent-minded, and can't get the concept push in my mind. Had the same situation last semester as well. =( I hope by Sat i could have a clear mind in the exam hall. Jiayou Shihui! You need to work twice as hard as others cause you're seriously lagging behind! Go go go! ^^

On the side note, last night i saw his name on msn. Kind of wondering is he using back that account again? This morning i saw that he is still on msn. O_o And he was there for the whole day?! It kept me wondering even more. Till i came back to my lappy after dinner, i saw his chat window blinking??!! I didn't reply, but i think he mistaken me for another person. I don't know how i should react to this person anymore. Ignoring might be the better choice? Should i be happy or not? Hmm...

Sometimes i wonder if i had some supernatural power. O_O Cause whenever i wish for something to happen, i will chant in my mind. And then it HAPPENS! =) Not immediately, but it happens. Maybe it is just pure coincidence, or maybe i'm not that unlucky uh. Haha. =D

Oh, and i get my new phone. Like finally! =)

Yeah. You talk to me but i did nothing. =(

Conflicting emotions.

Not sure what's got into me recently. Been having a mixed of reality and dreams. Dreams that seems so real, and reality that seems so fake. Maybe part of the reason is the stress from this semester. Too much projects, assignments and quizzes, leads to sleep deprived and leads to one hallucinating things. And I'm getting paranoid very easily, thinking people are secretly hating me. =/ Arrrgh, I'm getting into a pessimist soon. Please let me pass by these 1 month plus quickly, so that i can have my break. X_X

As mention before, I'm not staying in hall anymore, but i still get the feeling of missing home. O_o Because of the fact that almost everyday i stayed back at school till the unearthly hours, every time i reached home, all my family are asleep. And the only time i get to really chat with them is weekend, but sometimes the weekend is burnt away by school works too. =(

1 more month to exams, and i haven start my revision. It's even worst this time cause there's still some concepts i don't understand from the previous part. And you know what, i don't even know what i don't understand cause i haven look at it. I'm so dead man! x( My results are gonna flunk like hell. Pray that i don't get kick out of school, and pray that IA will really pull my grades up. I hate this 'i feel so dumb' feeling, cause it felts like my brain only contains water. Jiayou, ShiHui! You know you don't want this. Hang on.

and yes, i will do what the doctor's book says. =)

Back to school again.

Hehe. This is so me. =)

It's school time tml again. Mid-term break passed by so fast. My sense of guilt is growing as time goes by. This break is supposed to be a busy week but mine is so peaceful. It's like the calmness before a thunderstorm. =S And it's a total communication break for me and my friends. Been staying at home the whole week trying to mug as hard as i can, but i guess i failed. My brain just couldn't concentrate long before i wonder off.

Talking about school, i haven done the tutorial for tml yet. The tutor is gonna get so fed up if he knows anyone not doing tutorial and go for his lesson. =X See how hopeless i am? For the whole week and i haven done the things that i need for monday. My time management sucks! >:( Argh.

And i had those absurd dreams going on recently. It's amazing how my mind can twist things in the dreams. And worst till, some are even continuous dreams! xP I get headache when i worried about things too much, so better not think anymore. Attachment selection is coming soon. Getting so nervous cause i'm not prepared. My resume might be boring and empty. =/

Anyway my plan of getting a new phone has to postpone i guess. Haven decide which phone to get. Those that i want is expensive, and those cheaper ones are old model. =/

a little rest

Recess week is here again! This semester is the most number of times i skip lectures. Reasons? Due to the 830 lesson curse, my body is so reluctant to get up at 6+ a.m. everyday. And because of the Imagine Cup competition, the past few weeks were crazily rushing project. For now, i need to finish up all the video lectures before another round of project craziness starts.

I'm having lots of surprising dreams again. Maybe, cause I like to think a lot? O_o Haha. I dye my hair using the bubble dye again! Bought the pretty pink color, luc

kily it's not that bright. =) My phone plan has already reach 2 years, time to change phone but haven find the time to go see.

Anyway, the Japan earthquake and tsunami incident really makes me think if the Earth is making a big change to herself. 2012's scenes are appearing every now and then. Is the end coming near? What's in the future, no one can predict. I can only precious every day i have. Hope Japan can recover from this disaster, and so do other countries being affected.

If world is ending, will i be able to see all those who are important to me one last time?

how much do i worth?

I wonder why am I so dumb. My brain couldn't absorb the large amount of knowledge being pump to me in school. Even though nothing is said, i know i'm the slowest in this clique of mine. I know they understand that i can't do things well, so even if i can't help out much, they won't blame me. But this just leads to me thinking that i'm just a free-rider. I don't like myself to be so useless. Maybe being with people who are much smarter than me makes me feels inferior. There's always this peer pressure emotion since the start of school. This big learning gap that no one notice, is starting to get larger. Sometimes i wish i hadn't make this choice.

Shopping and more shopping!

Has been shopping a lot for these few days. Let's see...

Last sun was with PW to bugis and city hall.

Mon was with AP at Orchard, bought a pair of shorts.

Wed with AP again for movie Shaolin(4/5 stars) and bought a pair of shoe.

Fri had a long break of 6 hours, so we went to watch movie The Green Hornet(3.5/5 stars).

Sat was out with Fen and her sis to town again. Bought 2 pair of shorts but 1 pair can't fit in cause cannot try. =( But nvm, will try my ways on how to alter it, if possible. And really thanks Fen's sis for treating the food that day. =D

Haha. In the end i didn't bought any top for CNY, which was my purpose of shopping. xD Think i will wear one of the clothes in my wardrobe for CNY.

School started for a week already. The study mood is not coming to me, and that explains why i'm day dreaming most of the time. And everyone is falling sick. Maybe due to the changing weather these few days. I'm sick too. =( Just when my cough and phlegm is recovering, flu is here. Hope all these sickness thingy end before CNY. =/

Here's some oranges for CNY. Hehe. xP

D Day?

Even though I'm so reluctant to see my result, i still go see. Haha. You know when i see my GPA drop, my heart sink way down. But when i look further down, all my modules passed, and i actually smile. =) Actually i already predicted the results somehow, so didn't feel any emo or sadness now.

So, I'm back to a peasant again. But don't worry, Shihui, you just need to work hard and get your rank again. =) Anyway, the working society won't be largely focus on your GPA but your skills. So i think the most important thing is to brush up my skills, cause IA is coming and i need to make myself presentable.

Right now i just want to enjoy the rest of my holidays before it comes to an end. For the past 10 days, I've been staying at home looking after the construction works with either 1 of my family member. Dad got sick and pass the virus in the house. Bro and me got sick as well. =( But Mum is fine. =) There's still a lot of things need to clean up in the house. Turn from a refugee life to Maria life. x( Sad me.

CNY is here again. My hand is itchy to buy new clothes again. Haha. xD Wanted to buy lots of clothes so that i can wear in school. My clothes are so limited now cause hasn't been really shopping for the past 1 year? Need to find some cheap and nice clothes and shoes. =)

Ahhhhh...i really need to indulge myself before school starts. Cause i see a super big stress bomb behind. =X Hope that in the future my smile won't look so fake anymore. =)

2011 already.

It's another year coming by. Can't help to think how fast time passed by. Year 2010 was practically giving myself to school. All i could remember was school, home hostel. Not much enjoyment in my life. But at least i know my social circle is expending a little. =)

You know, sometimes i wonder why am i so quiet in front of friends. Many people asked me that question before but i never give them an answer. Maybe becau

se I'm a person who needs to know someone better before i could really chat with them. If not, i really don't know what to say cause I'm not a good ice breaker. =/ And i find that my conversation with my BFFs is getting lesser cause we don't have the same topic to talk about. This is absolutely not good. Cannot! I must communicate with them more often to find back the can-talk-about-anything feeling.

And i see that everyone is putting their new year resolution up. Right now i can't think of any except to find my life goal. It's just another year, nothing to be happy or sad about cause it's still a blank paper. Haha. But I'm curious in the coming of year 2012. Will it be the end of the world? Will i see ailens? Will any amazing things happen? Wish i could peek into the future. Hehe.

Anyway, think i would be stuck at home for 10 days or so. Why? Cause those workers will be coming in to hack the toilet down! Haha. Bet my ears and brain would be suffering from those drilling, hacking and moving. Think there would be air pollution too. Argh~ like a prison for me. Maybe prison also don't have to suffer like this.